My Black and White Strings
This blog post will probably not be well put together - but my brains about to explode because I need to put this in front of you before it's too late! Sounds a little dramatic I know, but if I don't share it with you now - when it happens, people may not believe me. With this post, I risk sounding absolutely nuts, but I can't wait to tell you this!
Before I tell you the recent story, I have to back up to August 2011 - before losing Elliot, before losing my Mom, before the adoption process, etc.
I have WILD dreams - most of them amount to nothing, but occasionally I have one that I know means something without a doubt. In Aug 2011, I had this dream that I was grieving because I had been trying to share how real God is with someone who just could not accept it. There I sat on the floor in this lake house with 6 strings, all yarn, before me - 3 black and 3 white. I contemplated God's will, and I began to pray, "God, without me laying a hand on these black strings, please tie them together. You are a God that is capable of this. Please God, hear my cry!" I opened my eyes expecting to see them all tied together - but they were not.
So a second time - the same prayer but with more intensity from my soul. Opened my eyes - Nothing.
Third time - with all intensity from my soul I prayed the same prayer, and cried out, "God, I know this is Your desire. Please tie these 3 black strings together!" I opened my eyes, just as someone was walking into the room, and all 3 black strings were tied together and, on the bottom of the black strings, all 3 white strings were also tied together. Words could not come out of my mouth because of complete awe.
>>>>>>>>>> Fast Forward 10/23/14
During my Bible reading and prayer time yesterday morning, I was feeling like a broken record as I was crying out to God to please bring our son, HC, home. The words from the Bible were really soaking into me:
As I read these words, I gave praise to God for His law, His timing, His peace and life He has given me.
With these words, I was realizing that if I already have something - there is no reason for hope because "it" is already there. It is waiting and longing that produces hope... some reason this was so comforting to me. Hope is a beautiful thing.
As I was taking it all in, these words were spoken clear as day to my heart:
"I didn't just tie the black strings together."
Pause.
Pause.
Pause.
This is about the dream from oh so long ago!!!! God did not just tie the black strings together! He gave me more than I asked for in that dream - He tied the white strings together too. I prayed for something seemingly so menial in my dream, yet God deemed it important enough to not only answer my prayer but to also go above and beyond!
I know you want to ask me - "so what does that really mean?" I think the general gist is "Halee, don't give up! Not only am I going to give you what you've been praying desperately from your soul, but I'm going to give you more." - from God.
I don't know specifically what He is going to give us - if it's "A" thing or if it is a season of blessings. I really don't know, but I rarely am as creative as God - so I'm not going to mull over all the possibilities; rather I am just choosing to be expectant of a gift. My God is a great big God and is so capable.
Oh, there is so much I want to say. I am in such hopeful anticipation. The Lord definitely filled my cup yesterday with a hope that I have long needed.
Please share your heart with me today. I would so love to hear your thoughts, your prayers.
Many blessings to all my readers.
Before I tell you the recent story, I have to back up to August 2011 - before losing Elliot, before losing my Mom, before the adoption process, etc.
I have WILD dreams - most of them amount to nothing, but occasionally I have one that I know means something without a doubt. In Aug 2011, I had this dream that I was grieving because I had been trying to share how real God is with someone who just could not accept it. There I sat on the floor in this lake house with 6 strings, all yarn, before me - 3 black and 3 white. I contemplated God's will, and I began to pray, "God, without me laying a hand on these black strings, please tie them together. You are a God that is capable of this. Please God, hear my cry!" I opened my eyes expecting to see them all tied together - but they were not.
So a second time - the same prayer but with more intensity from my soul. Opened my eyes - Nothing.
Third time - with all intensity from my soul I prayed the same prayer, and cried out, "God, I know this is Your desire. Please tie these 3 black strings together!" I opened my eyes, just as someone was walking into the room, and all 3 black strings were tied together and, on the bottom of the black strings, all 3 white strings were also tied together. Words could not come out of my mouth because of complete awe.
>>>>>>>>>> Fast Forward 10/23/14
During my Bible reading and prayer time yesterday morning, I was feeling like a broken record as I was crying out to God to please bring our son, HC, home. The words from the Bible were really soaking into me:
"For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace because the mind set on the flesh is hostile toward God; for it does not subject itself to the law of God, for it is not even able to do so." Romans 8:6-7
As I read these words, I gave praise to God for His law, His timing, His peace and life He has given me.
"For in hope we have been saved, but hope that is seen is not hope, for who hopes for what he already sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, with perseverance we wait eagerly for it." Romans 8:24-25
With these words, I was realizing that if I already have something - there is no reason for hope because "it" is already there. It is waiting and longing that produces hope... some reason this was so comforting to me. Hope is a beautiful thing.
As I was taking it all in, these words were spoken clear as day to my heart:
"I didn't just tie the black strings together."
Pause.
Pause.
Pause.
This is about the dream from oh so long ago!!!! God did not just tie the black strings together! He gave me more than I asked for in that dream - He tied the white strings together too. I prayed for something seemingly so menial in my dream, yet God deemed it important enough to not only answer my prayer but to also go above and beyond!
I know you want to ask me - "so what does that really mean?" I think the general gist is "Halee, don't give up! Not only am I going to give you what you've been praying desperately from your soul, but I'm going to give you more." - from God.
I don't know specifically what He is going to give us - if it's "A" thing or if it is a season of blessings. I really don't know, but I rarely am as creative as God - so I'm not going to mull over all the possibilities; rather I am just choosing to be expectant of a gift. My God is a great big God and is so capable.
Oh, there is so much I want to say. I am in such hopeful anticipation. The Lord definitely filled my cup yesterday with a hope that I have long needed.
Please share your heart with me today. I would so love to hear your thoughts, your prayers.
Many blessings to all my readers.
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