Run The Race

Passing on a legacy to the next generation is something that I am deeply passionate about.  Deuteronomy 6:7 says, "You shall teach [God's commands] diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up."  Ron and I have certainly tried to do this with our 5 year old son, Reese. During a car ride, our family was discussing our future adoption... we were all dreaming together a bit about how old the child may be, what he/she will be like, etc., when Reese said, "Is this kid going to be my responsibility?"  I thought that was a great question and an open door for us to have a meaningful conversation. I told him that he will not be responsible for his brother or sister but that because God loves us he does have a responsibility to be kind and to love his sibling.  Out of that love, I explained, that he may want to teach his sibling things... begin passing on a legacy...

In the days and months following our son's death, a fog set in - it returned after my Mom's death only a few months later.  I don't know how to explain the fog, but it is thick.  It was so thick that there are many things that I have forgotten or don't remember.  I remember things about Elliot, our family, just about anything surrounding the deaths, but I don't really remember much else.  This fog has mostly faded. My emotions are strange this morning as if the fog from the last year has settled back down onto my brain.  It's as if the sound of the world becomes muffled and moves in slow motion.  As the world around me tries to go faster and faster, I move slowly... It's as if my body is moving apart from me - almost in 3rd person. I don't choose to come to this place; it seems to appear for no reason at all.  What is its purpose?  I pray to God, "If it is from You, how can I embrace it for what it is? If it is not from You, please take it fro...

"Now I believe roller coasters are an ... accurate model for the Christian life.  You say yes to Jesus, and suddenly you are strapped in and you think, I'm going to die!   Then you begin the long climb of growth - Sunday school, baptism, church membership - and you think, Hey, no problem, I can follow Jesus anywhere , and then- ZOOOOOOOOOOM - you crash into the twists and turns of life, jerking left then right, up then down and fifty, sixty years go by and- WHAM!- your dead... If I were to have a heart attack right at this moment, I hope I would have just enough air in my lungs and just enough strength in me to utter one last sentence as I fell to the floor: ' What a ride!'" (Dangerous Wonder, Michael Yoconneli, pg 106) If you haven't read Yoconneli's book - you should.  Unfortunately I think many Christians will not exclaim "What a ride!" at the end of the journey.  Why?  In order for this ride to be exhilarating, we must open our eyes and be...