Run The Race

Dear Father: I can’t imagine what it has been like to have adopted me as you have.  I remember the day you adopted me… I was only 9 years old.  Tears filled my eyes.  It was amazing – You chose me! It only took a year or so before the “new” wore off.  Difficulties came my way, and for some reason, I blamed you.  I’m sorry I ran away at such a young age - how horrifying.  I cringe to think that you know all the things I did while I was away.  I’m so sorry, Father – You must have been crushed. Over and over I ran away, but you always brought me back.  I remember arguing with you but never feeling condemned.  You were firm but full of grace.  It seems that my rebelliousness through the years has NEVER caused you to waiver. The river of tears seemed never ending; I felt so lost.  There were countless sleepless nights – You never left my side, and you cried tears with me.  Seems so strange to me now that you sh...

I often pray the same prayer over and over - I don't mean it is said in tradition or just rote memorization.  It is sincere; a cry from my heart.  At times when I say that prayer, I wonder if I sound like a resounding "gong" - yuck. "... two blind men sitting by the road, hearing that Jesus was passing by, cried out, 'Lord, have mercy on us, Son of David!' The crowd sternly told them to be quiet, but they cried out all the more... moved with compassion, Jesus touched their eyes, and immediately they regained sight and followed Him."  Matthew 20:30-31, 34 Satan wants us to believe that God gets sick of hearing from us - just like the crowd telling the men to be quiet.  The two men in these verses kept crying out - not in complaint, but in faith, believing that this man, Jesus, could and would heal them.   Yesterday morning, my prayers were similar as they have been over the past two years regarding the adoption, but my heart cried out with sl...

Sorry, this post is long, and probably a little less for you than it is just "cheap therapy" for me. Several months ago, I committed to not answering the phone or checking any emails from the adoption agency without stopping first to pray.  How is it, then, that as soon as I saw an email from the agency last Friday, I flipped it right open without hesitation and without praying first?!?! Wish I could take that moment back.  The news in that email was not what I was expecting or hoping to read. Though a batch of kiddos had their paperwork moved to the "Exit Phase", HC's paperwork was not among those taken.  It should have been.  It could have been taken with the last batch that happened in June, but it didn't - so it was "definitely" suppose to progress with this batch.  People who signed their paperwork after us progressed this time around, but we did not.  We don't know why. It is very unlikely that any more batches will be accepted thi...